The Red Lynx Wagon

i. Expressionless Barney

Owing to my circumstances, I've become something of a conoisseur of insightful or unusually hilarious things said by children under the age of ten. I'm pretty sure the undisputed heavyweight champion of such statements is the following remark recorded by Judd Apatow in a diary he wrote for Slate:

My daughter Maude was 5 when she realized that Barney had only one expression. She couldn't stop laughing when she noticed this. She ran around the living room with this psychotic Barney smile which never changed, and then started saying, "I'm happy. I'm sad." She laughed some more and then screamed, "Help me! I don't know how to feel." At 7, my daughter also punched up the drunk-driving sequence in The 40-Year-Old Virgin—which features my wife, Leslie Mann, as the drunk driver—by saying to me one day in the car, "When mom is driving badly, she should fall asleep." The next day she tried to button the joke by telling me, "Dad, when mom falls asleep in the car, she should gas."

After we showed the movie to a crowd, I came home and told Maude, "Mom falling asleep got a huge laugh." To which she replied flatly, "Yes, but did she gas?" When I said, "No," she just shook her head. She is either in for a lifetime of neurosis or a lucrative career as a comedy writer.

I love that these insights come from a little girl named Maude. As that's one of the old woman names not to come back into nouveau vogue, and given Apatow's affection for Hal Ashby, I'm guessing his daughter's name is an homage.

ii. That Lingering Undead Problem

It seems that despite four Pittsburgh-centered Romero films on the subject and dozens of films by others, the region just hasn't faced up to the looming dangers.

iii. That Lingering Hearing Problem

It's been twenty-one hours and my left ear is still ringing pretty distinctly. My pal Shane took me to the U2 concert last night and we had a great time. They're fantastic showmen. Setlist and tour info here.

iv. Book Clubs

It's easy to get cynical about the emergent book club culture, provided, of course, that you can get past the idea that it's an intrinsic positive that people are purportedly reading books and discussing them. Ali pointed me to this article in last Tuesday's paper, and I think it's so fantastic that this club exists, even in its somewhat antiquated, dying-out form. It looks like we're now a little too far north for Ali to be eligible for membership under the criteria as they're stated in the article, but I'm glad it's there, and the thought that these women are going to such great lengths to pursue knowledge and understanding for its own sake-- and not because of a perceived economic, social or other advantage it might confer-- is one of the best things I've heard all week.

Then again, I'm not hearing much now.

v. The 2005 Three Rivers Film Festival

The 3RFF schedule was released this week, and ten of the fortysomething films apparently played in Toronto. Looks intriguing.

Thursday, Nov 3
B 7:30 (reception 6:00) Beyond The Rocks [US 22] with Philip Carli live (*)

Friday, Nov 4
R 8:00 (doors 7:00) Pride and Prejudice [UK 05]
H 8:00 (doors 7:00) Breakfast on Pluto [UK 05]
M 8:30 (doors 7:30) SQUONKumentary [US 05 a] followed by Squonk Opera live

Saturday, Nov 5
R 2:30 The Ninth Day [G 05]
R 4:30 Reel Paradise [US 05]
R 7:00 The President’s Last Bang [K 04]
R 11:00 X: The Man w the X-Ray Eyes [US 63] with Pere Ubu live (*)
H 2:30 Nickelodeon 5¢ Screening with Philip Carli live (*)
H 4:45 Iron Island [Iran 05]
H 7:00 Harlan County, USA [US 76]
H 9:00 Dorian Blues [US 04]
M 2:30 SQUONKumentary [US 05 a]
M 4:00 Das Bus [US 04]
H 6:30 (reception 8:00) Dumpster [US 05 a p]
H 9:00 (reception 8:00) Dumpster [US 05 a p]

Sunday, Nov 6
R 3:00 Jesus, Mary & Joey [US 04]
R 5:00 The Ninth Day [G 05]
R 7:30 The Squid and the Whale [US 05]
H 2:30 The World [China 04]
H 5:15 Breakfast on Pluto [UK 05]
H 8:00 Symbiopsychotaxiplasm: Take 1 [US 68]
M 3:00 Das Bus [US 04]
M 5:00 Mutual Appreciation [US 05]
M 7:30 Darwin’s Nightmare [Austria/B/F 04]

Monday, Nov 7
R 7:15 Reel Paradise [US 05]
R 9:30 The President’s Last Bang [K 04]
H 7:15 Harlan County USA [US 76]
H 9:15 Dorian Blues [US 04]
M 7:15 Darwin’s Nightmare [Austria/B/F 04]
M 9:30 Mutual Appreciation [US 05]

Tuesday, Nov 8
R 7:15 Jesus, Mary & Joey [US 04]
R 9:30 Pure [UK 05]
H 7:15 Symbiopsychotaxiplasm: Take 1 [US 68]
H 9:00 The World [China 04]
M 8:00 (reception 7:00) Film Kitchen [US a p] (*)

Wednesday, Nov 9
R 7:15 Pure [UK 05]
R 9:15 Dear Wendy [G 05]
H 7:15 Iron Island [Iran 05]
H 9:15 Côte d’Azur [F 05]
R 8:00 Video Data Bank program [US a]

Thursday, Nov 10
R 7:15 Dear Wendy [G 05]
R 9:15 À Tout de Suite [F 05]
H 7:15 Last Victory [Italy 04]
H 9:15 Côte d’Azur [F 05]
M 7:15 Electric Edwardians [UK]
M 9:00 Filmic Achievement [US 05 a]

Friday, Nov 11
R 7:15 Why We Fight [US 05]
R 9:15 Manderlay [Denmark 05]
H 7:30 (reception 9:00) Short Film Awards
M 7:15 Electric Edwardians [UK]
M 9:00 Dogplayers [US 05 a p]

Saturday, Nov 12
R 1:30 La Petite Jérusalem [F/ I 05]
R 3:45 Manderlay [Denmark 05]
R 6:30 À Tout de Suite [F 05]
R 8:30 The Memsahib [US/India 05 a]
H 4:30 Last Victory [Italy 04]
H 6:30 The World’s Fastest Indian [NZ/US 05]
H 9:00 My Beautiful Girl Mari [K 02]
M 4:30 Derailroaded [US 05 a]
M 7:00 Filmic Achievement [US 05 a]
M 9:15 Story of a Fructiferous Society [US 05 a p]

Sunday, Nov 13
R 2:15 La Petite Jérusalem [F/ I 05]
R 4:30 Lost Embrace [A 04]
R 7:00 Why We Fight [US 05]
H 1:00 The World’s Fastest Indian [NZ/US 05]
H 3:30 Short Films program
M 2:30 Derailroaded [US 05 a]
M 5:00 Ballets Russes [US 05]
M 7:30 Dogplayers [US 05 a p]

Monday, Nov 14
R 8:00 The Memsahib [US/India 05 a]
H 7:15 My Beautiful Girl Mari [K 02]
H 9:00 Keane [US 05]
M 7:00 (reception 5:30) Ballets Russes [US 05]
M 9:15 Story of a Fructiferous Society [US 05 a p]

Tuesday, Nov 15
R 7:15 Lost Embrace [A 04]
R 9:15 At Last [US 05 a]
H 7:15 Keane [US 05]
H 9:15 Harry Knuckles and the Pearl Necklace [Canada 04]
M 7:15 William Eggleston in the Real World [US 05]
M 9:15 Short Films program

Wednesday, Nov 16
R 8:00 At Last [US 05 a]
H 8:00 Harry Knuckles and the Pearl Necklace [Canada 04]
M 7:00 Photo Auction closing reception (*)
M 8:00 William Eggleston in the Real World [US 05]

Thursday, Nov 17
R 8:00 Blackmail [UK 29] with Alloy Orch live (*)

I'm going to sift through these and try to come up with between five and ten screenings I'd really like to make. Further details on particular films can be found here. Comments on any of them are welcome.